My mom holding one of her great-grandchildren.

In my last column, I talked about a new season of firsts – things once shared with my mom that I can no longer share with her since she passed the night of Sept. 21, 2022. I’ll never forget that date because it was when my life forever changed. And now I have to face yet another first without her. And this one is really tough.

For a few days now I’ve had this strange, unexplainable feeling, kind of like a foreboding. I couldn’t understand why until I looked at the calendar and realized that Mother’s Day was upon us. Mother’s Day is a very special day. I’m a mother, so of course this day means a lot to me. But this year, it’s also the first Mother’s Day without my mom.

My mom used to say, “I don’t care if I don’t get anything for my birthday or Christmas, but please don’t forget me on Mother’s Day.” My youngest brother’s birthday is May 8 and she would always say he was her Mother’s Day gift.

Although she always received birthday gifts and Christmas presents, I always wanted to make sure her Mother’s Day gift was extra special. But it’s not easy, pretty much impossible, to buy a present that can outshine a walking, talking Mother’s Day gift.

My mom taught me a lot throughout the years, not just as a child and young adult but long after I ventured out, got married and had children of my own. Some of those things she sat down and talked to me about and others I learned from just being around her and watching her.

Yes, my siblings and I are blessed to have had such a wonderful mom. She disciplined us but she never judged us. My sister, Sandra, and I recently reflected on a few of the many things we learned from her.

• Don’t complain about every little thing. She would say, “There’s always somebody worse off than you.”

• Never stop reading. Growing up, our house was always filled with books and magazines and newspapers and our mom could always be found somewhere reading. During the summer, my sister, brothers and I would walk to the public library in Minden, La., to participate in its summer reading program. My brother – yes, the Mother’s Day gift – started tagging along when he was 4 years old because he wanted to check out books, too.

• Treat others right and try real hard to not hurt anyone’s feelings. She was very adamant about this. Although, I do remember a time or two she hurt my feelings. But then again, I am kind of sensitive.

• Put your faith in God – always.

• Respect others and also have self-respect. We didn’t have a lot growing up but she taught us it’s not about what you have or how much you have, it’s about how you present yourself. When we were kids, I remember our mailbox was at the top of a hill close to the street in front of our house. Whenever my mom would venture out to that mailbox, she always made sure her hair was combed and she was properly dressed – no robe or house shoes. Yep, we teased her about that when we got older.

• Always take care of family.

• Work hard and manage your money.

• Don’t take anything or anyone for granted.

Most importantly, my mom taught me what it takes to be a great mom – not a perfect one, but still a great one. My sons are adults now and I’m still nowhere near the mom she was.

Another thing about my mom is she loved animals – especially dogs. She called them puppies no matter how old they were and she considered her friends’ and children’s dogs her honorary dogs. My sister, who has a dog named Roo, said no matter how many curtains Roo chewed or blinds she broke, our mom would always defend Roo.

My mom loved everybody and everybody, it seemed, loved my mom. I miss her so much and I feel so lost without her. When I was a teenager, I remember her sitting down to talk with me and comfort me after my heart was broken by a high school boyfriend. I was so hurt but I soon felt comforted by her words and the love I saw in her eyes.

My mom has always been there for me. And now she’s not. And since she’s been gone, I now know what it truly means to have a broken heart.

There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about her. I’ve also had dreams about her. I only wish I knew what those dreams meant. But I do know she’s watching over me. And knowing that gives me the strength I need to get through yet another first without her.

Happy Mother’s Day!