Deanna Sims, Chief Development Officer for the Children's Advocacy Center of Smith County, provides the closing remarks. (Jennifer Scott/Tyler Morning Telegraph)

More than 500 guests attended the fourth annual Spring Luncheon on Tuesday at the Green Acres Crosswalk Conference Center to mark the beginning of Child Abuse Awareness and Prevention Month. Hosted by Women of Courage, community leaders and attendees were invited to learn about the important work of the Children’s Advocacy Center of Smith County (CACSC) in their efforts to end child abuse.

“It is an educational event to empower the community to get involved with advocacy efforts for children in our community that have suffered abuse through physical or sexual abuse, neglect, trafficking, or have witnessed a violent crime,” said Lexington Fowler, communications coordinator for CACSC. “April is our biggest effort of the year to make the community aware of the reality of child abuse.”

Women of Courage serve as ambassadors for abused children by raising awareness, promoting prevention, and supporting the CACSC’s efforts. Since launching the initiative in 2022, they have used various opportunities — including the luncheon — to highlight the center’s vital work on behalf of the thousands of children it serves.

“(The statistics) hit you in some way whether you know it or not,” said Women of Courage member Le’Anne Southerland. “I think just being aware and sharing that something can be done about it is important. But you have to get plugged in, know the community resources, and build good relationships with the children you’re connected to so you can be a trusted adult if they need someone to talk to. There are many ways to support survivors of abuse, whether through volunteering, donating, or being an ambassador.”

One in 10 children will experience sexual abuse by their 18th birthday — a statistic that has remained unchanged for years, underscoring the persistent reality of child abuse. More specifically, 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are affected by sexual trauma during their childhood.

“That’s not including the other ways that we receive children through other trauma and so the need is huge in the community for awareness for prevention efforts,” Fowler said.

Camden Jones of Velocity Mazda welcomed attendees then Chris Phillips, CACSC board president, recognized community leaders and then led the prayer.

Judge Neal Franklin spoke to the guests about awareness and local statistics.

“One of the ways we observe is to make sure our citizens are aware of all the Children’s Advocacy Center of Smith County is doing to minimize trauma for children who have suffered from child abuse,” he said.

Smith County’s population is over 238,000 and over 55,000 of those are between the ages of 0 and 17, according to statistics shared by Franklin. Of those children, almost 14,000 girls and over 9,000 boys will have been sexually abused by the time they are 18.

“This doesn’t count the thousands who are physically abused or have been witness to a violent crime,” Franklin said. “This is a huge issue, not only affecting a large portion of our population, but the future mental health of our community.”

Terri Smith, Chief Executive Officer of CACSC, introduced the keynote speaker, Kevin Mulcahy, who spoke at last year’s luncheon. Mulcahy spoke to the crowd not only about his experiences as a survivor of child sexual abuse but also his time as a former federal prosecutor.

“He was so popular that we asked him back so he could share his experience as an overcomer of child abuse and then his journey as a federal legal prosecutor,” Fowler said. “He’ll walk us through what signs to look for, what grooming looks like and the kind of legal process of what unfolded from his specific case.”

Kevin’s story: a trust earned then violated

Mulcahy was 9 years old when he was first abused by his soccer coach, Randy.

“I trusted and loved Randy,” he said. “He was my very best friend in the world, and for two soccer seasons, we spent a lot of time together, not just during soccer, but outside of soccer. And he did a lot of terrible things to me.”

For Mulcahy, the turning point was one night at a YMCA sleepover meant for fathers and their sons, where Randy attended pretending to be Mulcahy’s uncle — a lie that led to hours of abuse in a shared sleeping bag.

“I spent the whole night at this YMCA sleepover, sleeping on the floor of a gymnasium being sexually assaulted by my very best friend in the world in a room of about 100 people,” Mulcahy said. “And I said nothing. I did nothing.”

It was during that time Mulcahy realized he had enough and began the process of separating himself from Randy but still carrying the burden of the abuse. Nearly two years after it began, he opened up to his father about what Randy had done.

“He’s a business guy, didn’t know a thing about childhood sexual abuse, but I told him everything that Randy had done to me,” Mulcahy said. “And my dad, despite not knowing anything about childhood sexual abuse, despite not having a child advocacy center to go to, he handled it like a champ.”

After telling the rest of his family what happened, Mulcahy went to the police and reported the abuse. He connected with the detective of his case. “He was like Superman to me,” Mulcahy said. “He wasn’t big and he wasn’t strong, he didn’t wear a cape or anything but I could tell he cared about me and cared about my family.”

After the initial prosecutor attempted to dissuade them from pursuing the case, a new prosecutor was assigned. On a cold January day, as Mulcahy walked to court with his father, his father spotted Randy outside smoking a cigarette and told Mulcahy he had two choices.

“We can go back inside of our car for the length of time it takes a man to smoke a cigarette, or we can walk by with our heads held high and showing that we are not afraid.”

The pair walked in with their heads held high; Randy pleaded guilty at the preliminary hearing and received a six months sentence.

“The case was over but my life wasn’t… and it was a roller coaster,” Mulcahy said. “The fallout from what Randy had done to me, not physically but mentally and emotionally. I always like to tell people it’s not what Randy did to me, it’s who Randy was. That hurts so bad. I never felt so worthless in all my life.”

Throughout his journey from high school to law school, Mulcahy carried shame and guilt which led to destructive habits, including heavy drinking and promiscuity. His deep shame even pushed him to thoughts of suicide, to the point where he wrote notes.

“These are life altering… consequences,” Mulcahy said.

As destructive as his life was, Mulcahy turned things around. He became a federal prosecutor for sex crimes against children, a position he held for 20 years. He now travels around the country telling his story and providing insight on how to be an advocate.

‘Be an ambassador’

Following his speech, Mulcahy sat down with Smith County District Attorney Jacob Putman to discuss key indicators to watch for when talking to a potential victim of child sexual abuse.

The key advice shared was to remain calm and composed during conversations with potential child abuse victims, as heightened emotions may cause the child to shut down. It’s crucial to document every detail, including the date, time and circumstances leading to the conversation. This information, known as outcry evidence, is vital in understanding the child’s first disclosure and providing valuable testimony.

“Don’t run away from conversations about kids being hurt,” Mulcahy said. “I know they’re not fun but if it comes up, be an advocate for all those kids. You don’t know what the people that you talk to are going through. Maybe they have something on their mind. Maybe they have something happening in their home or within their family. Be ambassadors, please, for our kids.”

For Mulcahy, the support in Smith County stands out as a testament to the community’s commitment. “This is a remarkably well-attended event to support the CAC,” he said. “I do a lot of fundraisers and they’re not this well-attended, so I would say the support from the community seems really strong here in Smith County.”

For more information on how you can support CACSC and their efforts, visit their website at cacsmithcounty.org.