Jennifer Flanders

My mother tells a story about her father that I’ve always found very intriguing. I’m not sure how old he was when he was finally issued a formal birth certificate, but it was late enough that he was able to choose the name that went on it himself.

For the first few years of his life, his family called him “Pete.” But around age 6, he purportedly told his mother, “If you’ll call me John, I’ll answer.” And from that day forward, John he was.

My son Joseph tried hard to follow his great grandfather’s example. When he was 4, he begged us to call him “Whale Boy Rob.” Later, the name he preferred was “Green-Eyed Billy Joe.” We’d humor him for awhile, but (thankfully!) none of those alternative monikers stuck.

However, he did eventually succeed in getting people outside our family to call him something other than his given name, totally unbeknownst to the rest of us.

I found this out by accident the first summer he ever worked as a lifeguard for Tyler Tennis & Swim. I’d gone up to the pool one day to drop off Joe’s car keys, and when I handed them to the guard at the front desk, she smiled sweetly and said, “These for J.T., right?”

“No, they’re—” I began before realizing we were talking about the same person. “I mean… that’s right,” I finished lamely. “They’re for J.T.” And Joseph has been J.T. to his friends—and even some of his siblings—ever since.

These are the stories that immediately came to mind when I found out April 9 is “National Name Yourself Day.” I’m not sure who dreamed up that holiday or why, but I agree that having (and maintaining) a good name is important. The Bible bears this out:

“A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.” (Proverbs 22:1)

Of course, this verse isn’t talking about actual names as much as it’s speaking of reputations. Most of us didn’t get to choose our own name, but we can choose the character and behavior that becomes associated with our name.

If you don’t like your name, you can have it legally changed. It will cost you something in terms of time, money, and hassle factor, but it can be done. Likewise, if you don’t like your reputation, you can change that as well. It isn’t easy to do so, but it is possible.

Do you have a reputation for being short-tempered? Lazy? Argumentative? Stubborn? Mean? Prideful?

Would you rather be known for your patience, strong work ethic, wisdom, kindness, humility, and generosity?

Then change your behavior. Consistently and conscientiously make a point of doing the right thing, and your reputation will eventually catch up to you.

On the first day of third grade, Jennifer Flanders told her teacher to call her “Jenny,” but the nickname was soon abandoned, primarily because Jennifer would never answer to it. She did eventually learn, however, to answer to all forms of “Mom”—even when uttered by other people’s children! Read more at https://www.flandersfamily.info.