JENNIFER FLANDERS, Family Matters

 

One of my favorite parts of the holiday season is getting a bundle of Christmas cards delivered daily to my mailbox. I love the festive stamps, the bright red and green envelopes, the glittery greeting cards and the family portraits. But I especially love the long, newsy letters we receive this time of year.

I know I’m dating myself to say it, but before the advent of Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram, Christmas letters played a vital role in helping folks stay in touch with far-off family and friends. In the beginning, that was my only goal in writing, so my first few attempts were consequently a little dry. But as our family grew, my goals changed. I found myself writing not so much to inform, but to remember.

Although I continued to send annual updates to everyone on our mailing list, I really wrote them for myself. The letters allowed me to freeze in time the moments I wished never to forget-significant milestones, everyday graces, hard-learned lessons, crazy mistakes, funny remarks. I wrote down the things that made me think or smile or laugh or cry, the things I wanted to treasure in my heart and to ponder for years to come.

It was a subtle shift, really, but it elicited an unexpected response. This willingness to share our foibles, to laugh at ourselves, to be sincerely vulnerable, allowed others to connect with us in a way that a brag sheet could never do. I guess it made our family more real and more accessible, because we began to get requests for extra copies of our updates.

Never mind that most of our letters were four pages long – recipients were passing them around the dinner table, sharing them with friends, saving them in three-ring binders. One woman told me her husband insisted on reading the entire thing aloud at his office party one Christmas.

We even received postcards from complete strangers, asking to be put on our mailing list. It was really bizarre. Meanwhile, my husband continued to read all our past Christmas letters aloud to me and the kids every December. This tradition triggers all sorts of fond memories that we then relive and discuss at length. It also teaches younger children their family history and lets them see their older siblings in a whole new light.

If you’ve never written a Christmas letter before, 2016 would be a great time to start. If you have a lot to say, you can copy my month-by-month pattern and pen 12 separate paragraphs detailing the highlights of your year.

If you’d prefer to write something shorter, try dedicating a paragraph to each family member, sharing what’s new from their perspective. Or use an acrostic pattern, beginning each paragraph with a letter from your family’s last name. Or keep it super simple and just use bullet points to list the year’s major events.

However you do it, I hope you’ll take time to reflect on the past year and jot down a few thoughts. Then share what you’ve written with friends and family this holiday season, but keep the original – for the memories. Jennifer Flanders has been writing Christmas letters for 30 years now. For free templates, samples and holiday stationery, please visit www.flandersfamily.info/web/about-us/our-christmas-letters/